Thursday, December 22, 2016

Refocusing

I have been overwhelmed for the last year. My father-in-law died at the beginning of the year, I finished my education program and became a new teacher, I am a parent to two pre-teens, we bought a new house and moved, and we're now preparing to sell our home and buy another. To say the year has been full feels like an understatement.

The new year is often a time of reflection, renewal, and new commitments. Judaism often dictates these rituals in my life, but this secular new year feels like a refreshing time for reflection and recommitment. As a teacher, I have few moments for sustained contemplation, and this break has been necessary as a new teacher.

My health - heck, my entire self - has not been a priority this year. My children and students have come first, and there is so little for me at the end of the day. I am emotionally exhausted at the end of the day. As a glazed over zombie, I am capable of eating and watching bad TV, but little else. My weight fluctuates within two pounds, but I never am able to maintain a healthy eating regiment. The only thing that has helped me maintain my health is being reflective, and I have no mental capacity or physical energy for this at the end of the day.

I'm not certain I can change any of those problems, or if it's an outlandish idea to focus on health when I must focus on so many other things every day (lesson planning, classroom management, parenting, and running a household to name a few), but I want to try and refocus. I want to be healthier. I want to fit easier into amusement park rides. I want to be fit and active. I want to climb a flight of stairs without being winded at the top.

I want to make small goals and try to accomplish them. Today's goal was to figure out my gym membership. I bought an elliptical hoping that it would encourage me to work out, but I have found that I am less likely to work out at home. I discovered that part of the joy of the gym is getting away from it all. So I renewed my old 24 Fitness membership and looked up Zumba classes. Maybe I'll go to a Zumba class tonight...